Achoo!
Sorry, I’m allergic to complete and utter bullshit.
Which is just what the Timberwolves’ Kevin Martin is slinging these days apparently.
While many of his teammates lamented the loss of Love and talked about how to move forward without him, K-Mart was still coming to terms with the fact this blockbuster trade existed at all. Talking with the Star Tribune‘s Jerry Zgoda, he alleged that he had only found out about Love being sent to the Cavaliers 24 hours earlier:
Pekovic knew of the news well before it happened, even though he was half a world away back home in Montenegro. Meanwhile, such word apparently travels slower to places like Ohio, where Wolves veteran guard Kevin Martin spends part of his summer.
“I didn’t know Kevin Love got traded until yesterday,” Martin said with a straight face at Monday’s annual media day at Target Center that preceded a midnight start to training camp in Mankato. “I’m not big on looking at blogs and all that.”
Reaaaaaally now? Are we supposed to believe this? Or is K-Mart facetiously yanking our chain in attempt to make light of an otherwise unfortunate situation?
Roll and embrace the latter, because it’s more likely than the supposed truth that doesn’t sound at all true.
That mess was everywhere. For weeks. For months. There was no escaping it. None whatsoever. Even if Martin doesn’t actively sift through Twitter timelines or surf the Internet, he had to know. Surely some of his friends are, you know, all about that world wide web and stuff. They had to tell him. A random story link masquerading as an advertisement tailored to Martin’s Internet preferences and searches had to creep up at some point. Or does he live deep within the most ignorant, devolved boondocks in the history of mankind?
And if by some miracle this was true, it doesn’t say much about Martin’s relationship with his teammates. Do they not speak during the summer? Colleagues typically talk and gossip when juicy crap is going down. How was there not a conversation between Martin and someone, anyone, involved with the Timberwolves?
Yes, I just spend hundreds of words writing about this, so Martin wins. I give him a thumbs up for delivering this anecdote without giggling like a little schoolgirl. Seriously, I wouldn’t have been able to get through it without cackling madly. That’s how unbelievable it is, and as I was lying through my teeth, I would know it.
But in the interest of covering all bases, someone get Martin a laptop or cell phone or one of those pocket-sized pagers.
Anything that allows him to maintain contact with the outside world during his offseason trips to 1893 will suffice.
Dan Favale is a firm believer in the three-pointer as well as the notion that defense doesn’t always win championships. His musings can be found at Bleacherreport.com in addition to TheHoopDoctors.com.
