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5 Things Lebron James Sucks At

5 Things Lebron James Sucks At

July 13, 2010 – Michael Cahill

The last few days in the basketball world have proven that no one likes Lebron James. Unless you live in South Beach you probably hate him. You are just chomping at the bit to see the Heat fall in the playoffs to either the Celtics, Bulls, or maybe the Lakers. But it doesn’t satisfy your craving to watch King James fall from grace now. You want to sell him short and proclaim “he’s not that good anyway” but he is good. He’s really good.

But we here at The Hoops Doctors know your pain and want to let you know that while LBJ might be good at basketball there are quite a few things he isn’t cut out to do.


I’m taking Federer or Nadal, or possibly a Williams sister to knock the king off the court in straight sets. If it’s anything like the Boston series James will leave and give up after the second set anyway. He’s not immune to quitting when the chips are down. Of course he won’t be so agreeable to that logic after the game. He’ll claim we have been “spoiled” by his awesome play which will have never resulted in a Wimbleton title.


Sure LBJ has size but if he’s a tight end coming across that middle I’d rather be Ray Lewis than Lebron. He’d get run over by guys who are bigger, faster, and tougher. See, to be great in football you have to want it. Lebron would tell us he wanted it but ultimately he’d go find the team where there was already a better tight end and he’d ride his coattails to a Super Bowl win. Now, this would have to be his buddy too because winning is kind of important but buddies are really important. That’s why half of his PR and marketing team can’t legally rent a car yet.


Well this wouldn’t be a good career move. My guess is the first day would go like this “Let’s say you are adored by the hometown in which you have been playing in for your whole life, then you decide that they can’t help you win a championship….and lets be honest you can’t do it as the man because you know how to dazzle but don’t know how to win. So you decide you are going to rip the heart out of your city, which is totally up to you and might mean more rings, the best move is to do it on NATIONAL TELEVISION. This is smart. So smart. Then go to a place where you will be second fiddle. This is a great way to ruin your image and legacy all in one punch.” Class dismissed.


Sure Lebron might play ball well but put him in the kitchen and see how good he really is. Of course he will razzle and dazzle us with neat tricks throwing things into bowls and handling the kitchen equipment like nothing you will have ever seen before. But when he brings you the finished product you are left wondering why it wasn’t better. How can a guy who is that good in the kitchen make food that is just so-so? It’s because Lebron has all the ingredients to make a great meal but he doesn’t know what to do ultimately to make it worth eating…..and then he brings in Dwyane Wade who makes the dish worth eating.


At anything really. At the end of the day he might get a ring or two in Miami. He might get 10 rings in Miami but that doesn’t make him a winner. There is something special inside Bill Russell, Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, Joe Montana, Derek Jeter, and Larry Bird. There was something that made them better than everyone else. They would’ve wanted to win above all else, they were winners. The idea of winning was paramount. My guess is that while Lebron James was giving his press conference on Thursday, Derek Jeter was figuring out how he can help make the Yankees a better team. Kobe was at the gym. Jordan was devising a plan to dominate the world of basketball owners and Lebron James was happy to have found a guy in Wade who will do it for him.

I’m not saying that Lebron should’ve have stayed in Cleveland or that he had to come to Chicago, but he made the sexy choice because his buddies were in Miami and it seems like the easy road to title town. That’s fine and it may pay off but it’s not the decision a winner makes. A winner isn’t afraid to carry the load. Winners want the big moment on the big stage and they want to prove to the world that they can handle it. Lebron James feared that spotlight and needed his buddies to fill that spotlight. So be it. He’s not a winner. No matter how many titles he gets. We know that now.

**Update** – Michael Cahill has written a follow-up post to this in response to the flurry of comments and emails received by The Hoop Doctors. Check it out here.

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Comments

  • B ryce

    You critics are idiots. This guy isn’t a winner? He won 66 games with a team that would only win 20 games without him. He has single handedly carried the cavs and because everyone is so dependent on him he has to be perfect. Then when you say to be great he must win rings and criticize him for putting himself in the best position to win…its ridiculous! Who would you rather play with Bosh & Wade or Walker & Williams?..yeah thought so…Also…you guys will shut up once he wins 3 rings like you did after kobe cheated on his wife and demanded a trade…everyone loves him now…

    • Anklesnap

      @B ryce,

      I’ll have to let the writer Michael Cahill answer those questions, but although what you are saying makes sense, I think the article was supposed to be lighthearted and more making light of all the Lebron hating going on these days. He says right up from that Lebron is “good, really good” at basketball.

      Personally I agree that critics put too much emphasis on how many championships a player has. Since the NBA is a business, sometimes great players suffer at the hands of poor business decisions by their owners and managers. When you think of the Barkley’s, Malone’s, Ewing’s, and other great HOF level players without a championship, you can’t deny their greatness regardless of title counts.

      Where I will disagree with you though is your comments on regular season wins. Its playoff performance that is a true measure of greatness. And Lebron always performs well in the playoffs. Even if some people think he gave up or didn’t give 100% I think they are wrong, Lebron to me always seems to be giving 110%. In that regard we may be in violent agreement. But that leads me to the second thing about your comments I would disagree with. Everyone shutting up and loving Kobe after he cheated on his wife and won championships.

      I for one think Kobe is still a douchebag off the court. On the court he’s an amazing player talent wise. He’s a great regular season player, but his performance always declines or levels off in the playoffs, where the play of the greats always increases in intensity and performance. Take game 7 this year of the NBA Finals. Kobe has Artest, Gasol, and Odom to thank or he’d have been sent packing by the C’s with another mediocre perfomance in another crucial playoff game.

      • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

        @Anklesnap, How can you say that Kobe’s “performance declines” when his stats clearly went up during the playoffs. On top of his stats improving, he would twist the knife in the chest of the opposing teams with plays that cannot be stopped, even by the best defenders in the league. Rings speak volumes when it comes to proving how much a great player wants to win. Good players win games, great players win rings!!!

        • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

          @21Ronin, not to mention, the Celtics looked tired and they didn’t have IT in game 7. The Lakers definitely won as a team, but it isn’t true that Kobe disappeared in the playoffs or Game 7. Also, Kobe grabbed 15 boards and set up his team to beat the Celtics at their own game (gritty defense, rebounding, hustling and scrapping). Real champions do whatever they have to in order to win a game. It is amazing to me that people say Kobe can’t score when he had 23 points . When you compare that to the 15 points that LeBron scored in game 5 (6 boards, 7 assists and 1 steal), you can see what the numbers look like for a player that disappears in the crunch.

        • Anklesnap

          @21Ronin, True enough, and his point production did slightly go up this year in the playoffs. His other titles they declined. Mainly though due to Shaq being the focal point of the team in the first thre titles. What I was referring to was his performance in the critical Game 7, with the CHIP on the line.

          Just for arguments sake, let me ask you this, if you took Dwyane Wade and put him on the Lakers this season instead of Kobe Bryant, do you honestly believe they wouldn’t win the the title? How about Lebron? Hmmm….obviously it’s opinion based….but interesting to think about…

        • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

          @Anklesnap, The Lakers have been built around Kobe Bryant. He won rings with Shaq as the #2 option. Even as the “#2″ option, he very easily been a #1 on a different team, but he took that spot and was a huge part of their winning combination. Actually, it was like they had two #1 spots because Kobe really was sharing the load. The offense was deliberate and Shaq was so dominant at that time that he couldn’t be stopped. They had to play the opponents weakness and Rik Smits wasn’t cutting it. These were Kobe’s numbers for the first three rings.

          Kobe Bryants playoff stats (AVG) for the 3 championships
          2000
          PPG-21.1, RPG-4.5, APG-4.4, SPG-1.5, BPG-1.5
          2001
          PPG-29.4, RPG-7.3, APG-6.1, SPG-1.6, BPG-0.8
          2002
          PPG-26.6, RPG-5.8, APG-4.6, SPG-1.4, BPG-0.9

          Kobe stayed put, stuck with the Lakers when his team was loosing. But the Lakers were rebuilt around Kobe and they also brought Phil Jackson back. A large part of the Lakers success is the ownership/management for building this team and keeping Phil. I am not making excused for Kobe, but his prime (statistically) happened to be when Phil Jackson and Shaq left. That is the story of Kobe Bryant. With that being said, I don’t think you can just plug in LeBron James and win with the Lakers. LeBron hasn’t shown that he can really play off a big man (post player) in an offensive set. So, the Lakers offense would not work for him. Also, LeBron is no where near as good as an outside threat as Kobe is. LeBron’s game is most dominant when he is blowing by people and getting in the air. When he does that, his jump shot starts to fall. Gasol, Bynum, Odom and Artest would not compliment that type of game very well. So, to respond directly to your proposition, I don’t think LeBron could be plugged in and win rings. Basketball is about chemistry, reaction, defense and determination. Wade could probably go to the Lakers and win some rings because he is more of an outside threat.

        • Anklesnap

          @21Ronin – very good points. The only thing I would add though is that one of Lebron’s other major strengths besides his quick first step and physical dominance taking it to the bucket, is also his court vision and passing abilities. That may complement quite well with a players such as Odom, Gasol, and Artest. Keeping those players happy and with more touches, you may see the production of the Lakers front line go up quite a bit with Lebron instead of Kobe.

          Would that balance out or make up for Kobe’s better mid-range to outside shooting over Lebron’s? Not sure, but something to think about…

        • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

          @Anklesnap, Ok. I can see where you’re going with that. I tend to think that if teams play off LeBron, they can cut off his driving lanes and stagnate his game. Turn LeBron into a jump shooter and his game fades. I guess it comes down to a matter of opinion, but I am curious to see how LeBron will interact with a dominant big man in his prime. LeBron’s vision is a gift, but big men need to be able to work with the ball, not just get the ball at the net. Kobe runs an offense better and he sets up his team by working through the sets. I haven’t seen that from LeBron yet. He will have to learn it this year because anything less than a ring is a catastrophe. Improvisation is great when you are a running team, that improvisation will flourish. Maybe the Heat will be a running team to take advantage of LeBron’s vision? I always thought James needed Jason Kidd to be on his team.

        • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

          @21Ronin,
          Just for clarity, the only reason that I was still talking about Kobe is because of the question if LeBron could be plugged into the Lakers and win a ring…… I think you need to put LeBron in an offense other than the triangle.

      • nicco

        @Anklesnap,

        I do not want to gang up on Anklesnap, but, yeah, how exactly does your performance decline in the playoffs yet you end up earning five championships? I mean, setting aside the rings, the man averaged 29.2 points a game during the playoffs with a broken finger; couple that with his minutes increasing per game and you have the “intensity and performance” that you falsely claim Bryant was lacking there in spades. Seriously dude, wake up.

        You cite Game 7 as evidence when, as 21Ronin rightly pointed out, Kobe Bryant may have shot 6-24, but he had 15 rebounds. The great MJ shot 5-19 (which is about the same percentage wise) in the close out game against the Sonics in 1996 and had 9 rebounds. This was no anomaly. Jordan also shot 6 of 19 and 7 of 23 that very same playoff season. I do not want to get into a fruitless debate about who had the worst close-out game or who the better player is or anything like that–the only point I want to make is that none should have to live and die by those games. Great players are entitled to less than great games. The fact of the matter is–more times than not–Kobe Bryant lights it up. You don’t become 12th all time scoring at the age of 31 by riding on the back of your supporting cast.

        But to the point, Anklesnap, how is LBJ performing well in the playoffs exactly? I mean, yeah, he looks good when he’s playing against scrub teams, but–for the past two years–as soon as he gets to a team that he couldn’t readily sweep the kid crumbles like the dry cookie.

        • Anklesnap

          @nicco, I don’t think we need the compare Kobe to Jordan regarding playoff performance, the stats are night and day. Jordan was statistically the best NBA Finals performer of all time. When it counts.

          Don’t get me wrong Kobe is amazing, but comparing his playoff performances to Jordan’s is kind of silly.

          Since you’re focusing on scoring….Jordan had a career 33.4 ppg playoff average to Kobe’s 25 ppg. Both amazing, but not really even in the same ballpark.

          12 of 13 seasons during the playoffs Jordan averaged more than 30 ppg, and one season his playoff average was over 40 ppg.

          Mind blowing stuff really.

        • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

          @Anklesnap, I agree that too many people try to compare the next best thing to Jordan. There have been several players that have come and gone that were said to be the next Michael Jordan and fizzled. Jordan’s career was much different than Kobe’s and the only thing that is similar is the way they move. Kobe and every other kid with a ball watched Michael Jordan. Jordan set a new precedent. I just have to get this out there. I am not a Jordan fan, but I am not dumb enough to deny his position among the greats.

          The part that everyone uses to debunk Kobe’s legacy is that he was #2 to Shaq. I disagree with that, but his numbers were inevitably affected by Shaq’s dominance. To compare Jordan to Kobe is all conjecture, similar to comparing LeBron to anyone that has won a ring by carrying their team on their back.

        • Anklesnap

          @21Ronin, agreed. And I don’t buy into the Kobe legacy being tarnished by being #2 to Shaq. Shaq was such a dominant physical presence at that time, there is no coach in the world that wouldn’t have built the offense around him. It’s high percentage basketball. Even if Kobe or Michael Jordan for that matter were averaging 55-60% from the field paired with the diesel, you’d still have to build your offense around Shaq and his 60+% shooting. 4th quarter is another story though…haha.

          As far as comparing MJ to Kobe I went through that back in 2009 at the following link. Keep in mind though that it was before either of Kobe’s last two titles, so it needs to be rejigged quite a bit…haha:

          http://thehoopdoctors.com/online2/2009/03/the-nextology-of-michael-jordan-part-viii-kobe-bryant/

        • nicco

          @Anklesnap,

          To quote myself, ahem: “I do not want to get into a fruitless debate about who had the worst close-out game or who the better player is or anything like that––the only point I want to make is that none should have to live and die by those games.”

          To underline my point, again, Jordan–great as he is–had bad shooting nights in NBA Finals games that mattered. To use that against Kobe Bryant and not Micheal Jordan is to employ a double standard.

    • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

      @B ryce, You and Lebron can’t have it both ways. There are only two scenarios that make sense. 1. LeBron James is a good player and he had a good team with the Cavs. You’re right that they won 66 games in the season, but the reason that they were winning is because they were clicking offensively. One player will not win 66 games, because because LeBron disappeared in the playoffs (remember Game 5?) and then you and every other #23 chaser cried that the team sucked. Now you, LBJ and every other person making excuses for him say that he couldn’t win a championship in Cleavland. The truth is, if Kobe Bryant was on a team that won the most games in the past two regular seasons, that team would win a ring. Let the excuses begin!!!!
      2. LeBron is too afraid of putting his legacy on the line. For that reason, he panicked and chose the option that is “most likely” to win a ring. That is why critics say write articles like this one. He DID take the easy way out and there is no way around it. If Wilt Chamberlain, Jerry West and Elgin Baylor didn’t win a ring, there is no way that this “Dream Team” is going to win a ring.

      I was one of the “haters” that was calling LeBron out while he was scoring like crazy and dominating the regular season. I have known for years that he is a media created phenomenon. He came in the league named “King” and if he is a king, he is Commodus. Real champions are like Maximus or Marcus Aurelius. Honor, teamwork, work ethic, determination and pure will power wins championships. Maybe LeBron can learn some of those traits from Wade and give up on his high school popularity contest, because personally, I don’t give a #$%! about who he went to prom with!!!!

      • Aj kaneria

        @21Ronin, kobe wouldve never done sh*t with the cavs name 1 game in the playoffs that mattered where Kobe took over?! None he f**ks up because of his poor shot selection. He’s nothig more then a volume scorer. Remeber game 6 in the 08 finals why didn’t Kobe take over? U can’t completely blame lebron for these loses just like u clearly don’t blame Kobe. Just cause he’s lucky enough to have Phil as a coach and shaw for 3 rings and gasol and odom and bynum and artest and ariza. Odom and ariza would be the 2 best players lebron wouldve ever played with on the cavs. U forget how the magic had more talent how the celtics had more talent. I’m not saying lebron will be Jordan but to act like Kobe is god is a buncha crap. Kobe has only been this so called man u talk about for 2 rings. Yeah it’s a team game but no doubt Kobe was robin and shaq was batman so point proven Kobe was a role player for 3 rings. And if Kobe is some beast how come he didn’t take over against the pistons. Clearly one of the biggest upsets ever and choke jobs. Shaq Kobe Malone and Payton yet Kobe can’t take over cause shoots dumb shots and kills his team. U also forget that Kobe has never ever ever lit up an super defensive team for more then 45 points. So stop expecting lebron to single handedly beat the celtics. Lastly pretty sure lebron averaged 35 points 9 rebounds and 8 assits against the magic….that’s insane when has Kobe ever done that much for his teams? I’ll tell u…never cause his teammates are good enough to where he doesn’t need to

    • damian

      @B ryce, CAVS suck-

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  • nicco

    And another thing, I like how Kobe Bryant is a “douchebag” while the self-proclaimed “Chosen 1″ produces an hour long infomercial, referring to himself in the third person no less than five times.

    I mean, the worse thing Bryant ever did, as an NBA player, was drive Shaq out of town–and that was because Kobe Bryant–unlike LeBron–wanted to be “the man.” It was ultimately this action that stained KB as a bad teammate. In the years since, it was Shaq–not Kobe–who was acting like a complete ass and, because Shaq is so affable, the same sports media that made LBJ sided with Shaq and burdened Kobe as the glorified sidekick who couldn’t do it without him. Cut to two championships and several years later, you have D. Fish and Ron Artest are taking less money to play with this “douchebag” and the first thing out of the mouth of the “douchebag” when he wins the Finals MVP is a shot out to Pau Gasol.

    Imagine Kobe Bryant delivering MJ’s hall of fame speech. Imagine Kobe Bryant proclaiming himself “The King” without without a crown to show for it. Imagine Kobe Bryant saying anything close to “Shaq, how my ass taste.” Imagine Kobe Bryant referring to himself in the third person or producing an hour long infomercial to announce his departure. I do not mean to say that Kobe Bryant is the most humble person in the world, only that, while you are hating on Kobe, worse things have been said and done in the meanwhile. Seriously dude, wake up.

    • Anklesnap

      @nicco, good points, was more referring to non-basketball related behaviour though, like treatment of women. Anything basketball related I respect his actions. His approach to the game, and his work ethic etc.

    • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

      @nicco, Amen!!!!

    • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

      @nicco, Ooops…..I meant to comment here……..AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • O-Neg

    Damn. I thought this was gonna be a critical in-depth look at things kang needs to improve.

    • Anklesnap

      @O-Neg, consistency of his outside stroke for one…he’s a streak shooter, needs to tighten up the fundamentals and become robotic, a-la Ray Ray

  • FballFan

    Dude….Lebron was a top football recruit out of high school. He could practically have played anywhere.

    • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

      @FballFan, I would like to see some LeBron football tapes. I played college football and I would really like to see him line up against some D1 linebackers. That may be because I don’t like LeBron’s image or his work ethic, but I really would love to see him be a tight end and have to scrap with middle linebackers or defensive ends that weren’t in high school.

      • FballFan

        @21Ronin, Here you go…courtesy of google:

        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdMPNIgeuoQ
        http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=4206504

        I understand what you’re saying about his image and work ethic. For someone with such raw talent and size at an early age, I can see how he might not have the best work ethic. I’m not a huge Lebron fan either, but I’m very intrigued by all of his abilities. I currently play D1 football and I would say that while he would definitely have to worry about those linebackers, they better watch out when he decides to lower a shoulder into them. In my opinion, he would be like a bigger, faster, and more athletic Martellus Bennett.

  • http://www.21ronin.com 21Ronin

    I actually already searched for some of his videos and I wasn’t blown away by his skills. Then again, he looked like he was playing with 5th graders. So, I just know that in football, you have to have your mind right or you will be put on your ass! Nobody will call a foul if someone sticks a good shoulder on his ribs. I also didn’t see LeBron really using his body to run over anyone. I don’t see LeBron having that amped/rowdy nature that you need to throw it down with the big boys (in football).

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